For all the talk of the most “awesome action cast ever assembled”, The Expendables is in truth just the Stallone and Statham show. The closing quotation marks in the poster below should really be traded for an asterix containing the key “may Contain traces of Willis and Schwazenegger”. But off-cutting the disappointment of feeling slightly jipped once again by marketing bodies, The Expendables makes up for it in almost every other department. A throwback to old school action? Sir, yes sir. Men flying through the air riding on the back of big explosions? Affirmative. A man on fire being punched in the face in what can only be a homage to the thwarted Glasgow Airport Attacks? Aye and thrice aye.
In true old school style we open with our men on a mission. Led by Stallone and ably supported by his band of merry men (Li, Statham, Crews, Couture and Lundgren) we find out, pretty quickly, that these ‘ultimate killing machine mercenary types’ are the ‘morally sound killing machine mercenary types’. When the unhinged Dolph tries to hang a Pirate (yes really), the rest step in and show that their hearts are also big muscles. This rapid set up tells us pretty much all we need to know as Stallone seeks his next job. Offered by a certain John McClane, turned down by a certain T-1000.
So that scene. Stallone, Willis, Schwarzenegger together for the first time since they tried to sell the world meat patties in buns surrounded by pictures of themselves. There’s no doubting it, any movie fan will be jumping for glee to hear the three trading insults and flexing metaphorical guns. It may well prove to be one of the highlights of 2010 but at the same time it really is blink and you’ll miss it. The heavy lifting returning once more to Stall and Stath.
And why not? Our very own Jason Statham has definitely been the man of the 00′s in terms of balls out action and Stallone has proven himself time and time again, despite his almost indecipherable tongue, as the man to go to for blood, guts and ‘sly’ political subtext. Yes, look below the surface of many Sly films and there is always a sneaky little ‘tut tut’ to the American Foreign Policy. On the surface the baddies may be Cuba-esque dictators but behind them it’s money grabbing Yanks whose inquisition methods include Cheney fave, Waterboarding.
As well as the subtle ‘messaging’ the film takes a further elevation in class with the inclusion of one Mickey Rourke. Left out of the action, Mick instead brings an air of quality in monologuing and advice as a sort of Yoda for The Expendables. But let’s not get carried away, The Expendables is at heart a silly, fun, more than enjoyable slice of Saturday night fun. The kind of film where Jason Statham sits in the nose of a plane machine gunning a jettee to pieces on a whim.
Before I go I should also mention, for your consideration, the cast includes Cordelia from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and latterly Angel, the spin off series that was set in L.A.
